It’s-a me, Mario! Today has been particularly rough. First, that shirttail riding brother of mine got himself lost in another haunted house. It wasn’t so bad, as it only took me a few hours to get him out. Still, after all these years, don’t people expect more from the Mario Brothers? It got worse, though.
Then I had a pickup game of soccer over near Toad’s place. The only problem was that Bowser, as usual. He and Wario were playing on a team together and I’m pretty sure they were Barry Bondsing it up, if you know what I mean. At one point I’m fairly sure I saw the ball burst into flames. What’s with that? That isn’t normal, let me assure you.
I thought a relaxing round of golf might make me feel better, so I called up Yoshi. For some reason the goon was standing on top of my house, so after coaxing him down we went off to the Mushroom Kingdom Public Links course. Upon arriving we round a particularly annoying foursome of redneck gorillas ahead of us who simply refused to let us play through. To add insult to injury, Yoshi kept licking my club. What is it with that guy?
So, I came home and crashed on the couch. I flipped on the television and of course the only thing on as usual was Smash TV. Look, I get it. Seeing mutants blown to bits for money is fun, but can’t we get any non-reality television? Reception around here is the pits. I’m going to bed. Maybe tomorrow will be better. I hear Link might want to meet up with Jigglypuff and Fox for a smashing good time.
- Mario
Related posts:
- Dear Diary: Master Chief’s titanium-alloy deepest thoughts
- The Great Games: Super Mario World 2: Yoshi’s Island
- Super Mario Fusion fuses every great game from your childhood into one
- Four things that the Super Mario series gets wrong
- Super Mario 64 goes old school with Classic Edition mod
Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.
Loading ...